By Theola Labbé Washington Post Staff Writer Saturday, August 17, 2002; Page B01

Families often keep the emotions private, but the anguish of suicide will have a public face in the Washington area this weekend when thousands are expected to raise awareness and money for suicide prevention with an overnight, 26-mile walk.

The Out of the Darkness walk, scheduled to begin at 6 p.m. today in Fairfax County and end on the Mall tomorrow morning, is described by organizers as the first overnight walk for suicide prevention to draw participants from across the country.

Nearly every state will be represented among the estimated 3,000 people, who paid a $100 registration fee and raised at least $1,000 each, organizers said. The proceeds will go to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, a New York-based nonprofit group that since 1987 has supported research and assistance programs.

Each year, according to the foundation, there are more than 29,000 suicides in the United States. Although suicide is the country's 11th-leading cause of death, little progress has been made to increase understanding and remove stigmas, said the foundation's executive director, Robert Gebbia.

"There are walks for breast cancer, but there has never been national attention brought to suicide," Gebbia said. For the thousands of people who have lost someone to suicide, "it's their first opportunity to come out publicly."

Pamela Valentine, 47, of Potomac has been training for five weeks to participate in the walk. Her son Michael, a 21-year-old University of Maryland student, killed himself in June.

Valentine said her son suffered from depression as he struggled to balance his responsibilities to himself, his friends and his parents. At the same time, she said, Michael unselfishly lent an ear to friends in need.

On the walk, the Valentine team will include Michael's siblings, aunts and friends as well as his parents. The group plans to wear bandannas adorned with Michael's photo in a heart. "It's not about your lifestyle, where you live, [and] it's not about what you give your children. It's chemical," Valentine said about depression, which she herself has battled for years. "I'm hoping people will stand up and realize: Don't wait until this affects you, because then it's too late."

Bob Thompson is coming from Vermont to participate. He has encountered suicide three times: with his cousin, his first wife and his sister.

Losing his wife in 1982 was a terrible blow, Thompson said. He didn't want to talk to anyone. An avid hunter, Thompson sold his guns, afraid that he might choose to do what his wife did. He recalled the difficulty of explaining her death to their child: "How do you sit down with a 13-year-old daughter to tell her her mother's not coming home tonight?"

He saw an ad in a national magazine about the walk, signed up with a close friend and raised nearly $5,000.

"People have to understand it more and talk about it," he said, "so that people in depression can say, 'Look, I'm in trouble. Help me.' "

Pallotta Teamworks of Los Angeles is producing the event. The for-profit company has split from other charities in the past year -- sometimes amicably, sometimes not. In May, the Whitman-Walker Clinic and Food & Friends canceled a three-day AIDS bicycle ride in the District because of low registration. But when a charity pulled out of an AIDS bike ride in San Francisco because of cost overruns, it was sued by Pallotta.

Pallotta spokeswoman Janna Sibley said past business disagreements, although unfortunate, should not take away from the purpose of the events.

Kelly Willitts of Waldorf will walk with her husband, Bob, her extended family and a group of high school students who were friends of her daughter Ashley, 16, who killed herself in January. "Ashley's Angels" held car washes to raise funds.

Like many others, preparing for the walk has been Willitts's focus. Tomorrow, when it is over, the grieving will begin. "I'll have to face the fact that she's gone," she said. "It will be time to begin the healing process."

© 2002 The Washington Post Company

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